This is the Orion Press feedback section for our website's non-fiction articles. Readers are encouraged to send in their comments on any Orion Press story, article, webpage or publication to the editor via email at feedback@fastcopyinc.com or via USPS at 3211 Saddleleaf Avenue, Albany, GA 31721. Remember that the only reward any contributor receives is the satisfaction of seeing the readers' opinions of his/her work. The following missives are excerpts from feedback received from various folks who have read some of our non-fiction articles, commentaries, reviews, et cetera.
From Caroline Kaberline -- March 2008
I had a chance to read your editorial while my students were working on an assignment, and I agree with your comments whole-heartedly. In fact, I couldn't help but chuckle at DeCandido's remarks and his implication that no real writer would be writing fan fiction. I wonder if he would be telling people like James Gunn, Greg Bear, Greg Benford, George Zebrowski, and Pamela Sargeant--to name just a few--that they aren't real writers because they've written some Star Trek novels. I believe when I talked to Jim Gunn last week (for an article I'm writing for the Topeka Capital Journal) that he's either written or edited 40 plus books, and the others have written numerous novels, short stories, and in some cases non-fiction also. And most of these writers do realize that fans count--unlike Mr. DeCandido. I wonder how well his work sells. {I'm sure it sells as well as any other Star Trek book these days. What is noteworthy, I suppose, is that Pocketbooks has now put their e-books on hiatus. I remember when Star Trek books used to make the Best Sellers lists. Of course, back then, fans mattered. Long gone are those days. -- Randy}
From Sam Taylor -- February 2008
I can't tell you how much I enjoy and appreciate Dave Eversole's reports and analyses of The Original Series' scripts and drafts. Thank you for this labor of love.
I have a question. The original "Conscience of the King" was entitled "A Portrait in Black and White", yes? You have the script, and you say so. That also jibes with the memo paraphrased in Whitfield's The Making of Star Trek and it's more literal inclusion in Justman's Inside Star Trek, wherein around September of 1966 Roddenberry says something like "I am also enclosing a script [Portrait in the Justman book] just received by this office [from Barry Trivers in Justman] that you may have equally strong feelings about", or something to that effect.
And yet I have read from several sources that "Portrait" was the source for "Let That Be Your Last Battlefield". See this quote from Wikipedia:
"There is some evidence that this script evolved from Gene Coon's unfilmed first season script "A Portrait in Black and White." That particular script also dealt with racial issues, and would have featured Uhura and McCoy trapped on a planet where white people were slaves and black people were the masters. According to David Gerrold, Herbert F. Solow, and the recollections of Gene Coon's widow, Jackie Coon-Fernandez, the Trek production staff worked and reworked the script for nearly three years before it reached its final form."
Now, the titles make sense. And the fact that Coon (Lee
Cronin) is credited for "Battlefield", and that Oliver Crawford (who was hanging
around in 1966 at that time writing "Galileo 7") makes me wonder if
"Cronin" and/or Crawford took a portion of the "Conscience" script,
rewrote it, and then resold it.
But the concepts are so entirely different as to boggle the mind.
Can you shed any light?
Dave replies:
Thanks so much for your very kind email.
The copy of the script I have is called "The Conscience of The King." My
statement that it was originally called "A Portrait in Black and White" was
based on the very same sources you quoted. I disagree with Wikipedia, but so far have no
proof to back up my statement. Should I ever get an earlier draft, perhaps the mystery
will be laid to rest.
Again, thanks for emailing us. We here at Orion Press appreciate the feedback of our
readers.
From William Batross -- February 2008
I love your site; it is very informative and interesting! It is on my favorites and to me, one of the top Star Trek sites on the web!
From Fred Dixon -- February 2008
...really like the website, especially the Unseen Elements of Star Trek page....I enjoyed reading your reviews of the various drafts of Star Trek scripts. I always thought that "The Naked Time" and "Tomorrow Is Yesterday" dovetailed. "Assignment : Earth" was a decent enough episode; I don't know that it would have gone far as a series had it been picked up. "Fascinating" stuff.
From Caroline Kaberline -- December 2007
Many thanks for the hours of enjoyment your website has provided. I appreciate your allowing me to add to it by writing reviews! {And we appreciate your contributions to the site! -- Randy}
From Fabian Boudville -- December 2007
Do you give any reasons for your TOS ratings?
{They're my ratings, and as with anything else I write, your mileage may vary. I knock off 3 or 4 or more points for each problem I encounter with an episode, and so if an episode receives a 78, then you can figure I had about 6 problems with it. -- Randy}
For instance, you assigned 91% to "The Empath"--a rather controversial episode which Star Trek fans either love or hate--and 78% to "Spectre of the Gun" but no reasons are given.
{Well, it's just a chart of my rankings. I wasn't inclined to explain every single episode's ranking, but to answer your inquiry, "The Empath" is one of the best episodes in my opinion, but there are a few problems I had with it, the foremost being the taming down of the scene that was cut where Gem breathes life into McCoy. I also wish Lal and Thann had been more aggrieved by Link and Osaba's deaths, and I thought that it odd that Lal and Thann were wearing such impractical outfits and yet had enough fashion sense to give Gem a cute outfit--unless their race of mutes somehow manage textile engineering and fashion design without the ability to speak?
"Spectre of the Gun" is interesting, but I thought that Kirk and Company were too slow on the uptake, Chekov's death a gimmick, his sudden return to life at the end a major cop out, and the scene where Kirk goes to get help from the Sheriff just falls apart. And that's just a few of the problems I had with it. :) -- Randy}
As an aside, I am suprised you gave 60% to The Way to Eden. I personally thought it was simply the worst TOS show ever made and should be rated as a failure (i.e. anywhere below 50%) The plot holes and lack of logic in that episode was simply massive.
{I tend to think that "And the Children Shall Lead" is probably the worst TOS episode ever. I mean, it's dreadful. Plot holes and lack of logic abound in it. "Spock's Brain" was only marginally better. Only "The Infinite Vulcan" equals it in crappiness, and "Generations" is so bad I don't even bother counting it (but my last recorded rating for it was 32). -- Randy}
PS: Thank you for your TAS ratings. Its a pity many Trek sites don't rate these 22 episodes...when several important ideas such as the holodeck or James T(iberius) Kirk first appear here. Thank You.
{No worries. I love TAS, and think some wonderful episodes came from it. I'm glad my rating provoked a thoughtful response, and I hope you continue to enjoy our website. -- Randy}
From Diane Doyle -- December 2007
I enjoyed reading the reviews of the Star
Trek novels, Ishmael and Uhura's Song since those were two novels I
had enjoyed when I had originally read them. I noticed the following omissions
in the reviews:
For Ishmael, Aaron Stemple, the antagonist to the Bolt Brothers in Here Comes
the Brides, was the main protagonist in this story, besides the Enterprise
crew. He rescued an injured Spock, nursed him back to health, and passed him off to the
people of Seattle as his nephew. The review made no mention of Stemple, nor that he was
played by Mark Lenard, who played Sarek.
For Uhura's Song, in order become an adult on Sivaoa, a person must form a
team of several people and make a difficult journey with them to another
camp. The landing party made a journey with a pair of Sivaoans who had not previously
been successful at such a journey. One of them, Jinx, had taken part in two failed
journeys and other Sivaoans were reluctant to accompany her, as a result. Our landing
party's journey was complicated by the fact that Chekov had contracted the most
virulent form of ADF, with his condition rapidly growing worse.
These omissions, though, were hardly noteworthy and did not reflect badly on otherwise excellent reviews.
From Albion Minzey -- December 2007
After reading on your website about how the
director of "The Enemy Within" changed the sequence of events for
"dramatic" reasons, I thought it might be interesting to see how the episode
would have played out as scripted so I reedited it. Thought you might be interested in
seeing the results. Here's a
link to the video on YouTube. I mention your website in the video
description; hopefully it has helped to make more people aware of the great work you're
doing.
Just want to let you know that I looked for years to find the info you've been putting on
your website. This is the only place on the internet--or anywhere--that has posted this
wonderful info on the development of the original episodes. Keep up the great work!
From Timothy Aymar -- October 2007
Thanks for the reviews of first draft scripts and unproduced
story outlines.
I find it fascinating to read about episodes that were never made, and it provides
insights into the creative processes of the writers involved with the original series.
Can't wait till all the outlines have been reviewed! Take care.
From Mallory -- October 2007
Cool stuff yet again. I really appreciate these reviews and the background information you provide.
From Dave Tilotta -- October 2006
Thanks for the new stuff. It's always fun to read your updates. I also find your site an
invaluable resource for matching film clips to cut scenes. Keep up the good work! I
thoroughly enjoy your site.
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